Divorce is not an easy process, regardless of the reasons that the marriage is ending. Marriages end from simple things like arguing and fighting to more complicated issues like abuse and infidelity. When you separate your lives and determine that divorce is the right thing to do, the situation becomes increasingly emotional when you have children involved.
How you tell your children about the divorce makes a big difference in how they process and deal with the changes. While most kids will have some sort of struggle, you can limit the problems by handling the announcement correctly.
Consider the circumstances and setting
This could be one of the more traumatic experiences in the lives of your children and they will always remember the setting and circumstances. Break the news in a safe, comfortable space for them. Your child may remember this moment forever, and you want to limit the trauma as much as possible.
Present a united front
Your marriage may be ending, but your commitment to loving and raising your children is not. Tell the kids together so they see that you are united in your desire to meet their needs and keep them happy. Even if you disagree on most things in your marriage, you should agree on what you plan to tell your children.
Be honest in your answers
Your kids will probably have some painful questions for you to answer, and this is your chance to give them honesty and earn their trust. There are some things that you do not need to involve your kids in, but when you can, answer their questions as honestly as possible. Address their feelings even when they are difficult to talk about.
Be the adults
If there is constant fighting and bickering as you decide to divorce, now is the time to put it aside for your children. You should act like the adults in the situation no matter how tense or emotional your situation is.
A divorce that drags on forever can be particularly difficult on kids. If you decided to end your marriage and want to minimize the damage as much as possible, meet with an attorney to set up a plan before dropping the news on your kids.